[Riley won't even have to look at her eyes to know that she's made her point. Ellie goes very quiet, resting her bracelet on her lap. Her face is flushed, her freckles standing out.
Why is she fighting this so hard? She's never been the "hero" type, needing to save any stranger that comes along. Killua is a stranger, one of the many faceless people she's fighting to keep safe in this city. She's never even felt this much of a pull to protect the people in her own world. Being the cure is an abstract obligation.
She fights like hell, not because she wants to, but because she can't do any less. Even when she saw the fighting in her city, she never up and joined the Fireflies. It wasn't her battle. None of this was her battle until she got bitten, and then, suddenly, the world fell into her lap.
Riley was the one who changed her, who made her feel that she should fight, should make her own destiny, should make something of the two hands and the brain she'd been given to do something worth it.
Bringing the cure to the Fireflies, fighting in this war... she's doing it because she cares about making something better than this. Why shouldn't Killua, too? Who is she to say he shouldn't?
... and even so, there is that small, selfish part of her. The part that needs other people to be safe. Not so that they'll keep their lives, have futures... but because Ellie is so very lonely, and so very tired of death, and she's becoming more like Joel than she's ever realized.]
video; private
Date: 2014-08-13 08:10 am (UTC)Why is she fighting this so hard? She's never been the "hero" type, needing to save any stranger that comes along. Killua is a stranger, one of the many faceless people she's fighting to keep safe in this city. She's never even felt this much of a pull to protect the people in her own world. Being the cure is an abstract obligation.
She fights like hell, not because she wants to, but because she can't do any less. Even when she saw the fighting in her city, she never up and joined the Fireflies. It wasn't her battle. None of this was her battle until she got bitten, and then, suddenly, the world fell into her lap.
Riley was the one who changed her, who made her feel that she should fight, should make her own destiny, should make something of the two hands and the brain she'd been given to do something worth it.
Bringing the cure to the Fireflies, fighting in this war... she's doing it because she cares about making something better than this. Why shouldn't Killua, too? Who is she to say he shouldn't?
... and even so, there is that small, selfish part of her. The part that needs other people to be safe. Not so that they'll keep their lives, have futures... but because Ellie is so very lonely, and so very tired of death, and she's becoming more like Joel than she's ever realized.]
I just-
Fuck, Riley.